What happens when you take the beast that is the Real Housewives franchise and tweak the characters, settings and story lines ever so slightly to push the final result from really ridiculous to hilariously ridiculous?
Why you get the Hotwives of Orlando of course!
If you’re like me then you have never watched a single episode of any of the Real Housewives series. You know about these shows and know they exist, you may know of some of the people involved (NeNe Leakes is my limit here), what they do and know that in general, these Real Housewives shows are just a bag of flashy mess, so thankfully, Dannah Phirman and Danielle Schneider came along and created this incredibly funny, racy and wink wink parody for Hulu that means i’ll never have to watch a Real Housewives episode ever!
Taking notes (or basically whole pages) from the Real Housewives franchise, the Hotwives of Orlando follows the lives of a handful of fictional (and hopefully one day iconic) women whom, just like the Housewives series, “don’t want no drama”. There’s trophy wife Tawny St. John (Casey Wilson) who is a loving (ahem) wife to her (somewhat) dying husband Phil while spending adult time with her personal trainer (oh hi Joey McIntyre!) and arranging ludicrous charity events such as Classy Canines which aims to see every dog in a pair of heels (only a pair?).
Big time spender Shauna Maducci (Danielle Schneider) is unable to see her family’s forthcoming bankruptcy over the mounds of designer dresses lying about. Her anger issues reach everyone from her husband Anthony to her on again-off again best friend Tawny.
There’s also finger in every pie Phenomenon “Phe Phe” Reed (Tymberlee Hill) who is constantly busy with being a lawyer, foot model and aspiring taxidermist (among a myriad of other pursuits) yet she is super supportive of her husband’s chosen career as a sports mascot and a show like this would not be complete without the British cougar in the form of (and winner of the best name ever) Veronica Von Vandervon (Andrea Savage) who relies on her sexually overt and vulgar sense of humor to nab herself younger men.
Rounding out the cast is Christian girl Crystal Simmons (Angela Kinsey) a local Orlando weather girl who while claims to be a devout Christian but has never read the bible because “it’s written in Jewish” and my personal favorite in Amanda Simmons (played by the wonderful Kristen Schaal) a former child star living off the fame that came with being the Florida prune juice girl who also happens to have a rather torrid affair with drugs and alcohol.
The brilliance surrounding Hotwives is that, with just the slightest tweaks from the source material, the absurdity that resides within the Housewives series becomes less jaw dropping “Is she for real?” to “This is fucking funny” for Hotwives and while some are calling the jokes lazy, I call it genius and that even though the jokes are more likely to be relevant to those familiar with the Housewives series, they are not lost on someone like me who refuses to watch the original.
Schaal, Wilson, Schneider and the rest of the cast must be relishing being able to play these boisterous and brassy women that we’re allow us to laugh at without also feeling sad for.
The first three eps of The Hotwives of Orlando is now available on Hulu with more to come including including the necessary reunion special!
It’s here and it looks just as godawful as the first outing! The Sharknado 2: The Second One trailer dropped online today and it looks so damn bad that it’s gotta be good.
The sequel to the ‘movie event’ of last year (ahem) once again sees Ian Zeiring and Tara Reid fighting tornado’s spitting out sharks but this time round, the action has been moved to New York City.
Along with Ziering and Reid, other suckers along for the ride include Vivica A Fox, Sugar Ray frontman Mark McGrath, Kari Wuhrer (Sliders), Judah Friedlander (30 Rock), Andy Dick, Kelly Osbourne, Billy Ray Cyrus and Judd Hirsch and yes, that was Matt Lauer making a cameo too.
For those hanging to see this giant mess, Foxtel announced that we will be gettin Sharknado 2 fast tracked to our screens within minutes of the US. SyFy channel will air the movie on July 31st at 11:30am with a late-night repeat set for 9:30pm and perfect timing to take part in the numerous Sharknado 2 drinking games that will be sprouting up shortly
Sharknado 2: The Second One airs Thursday July 31st at 11:30am/9:30pm on SyFy Channel.
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s a model flying through the air for a campaign shoot for the new Lexus CT 200h!
Starting off, Team Naomi are reveling in the fact that their weak link Brittaney is no more, making them once again the strongest of the two remaining teams. They ‘feel bad’ that Britt is gone but don’t really mean it. Bitches.
Team Cheyenne are..wait….who’s that chick?
I don’t remember seeing her before. There’s Nikolina and NSFW Olivia and Yaya….where’s Yaya and her glorious head of blonde weave?
What? That’s Yaya?
Her weave is now gone allowing us to “see her brain structure more” and leaving us with a completely different looking model. While NSFW Olivia and Nikolina both love the look they now see Yaya as a massive threat to them making the final.
So Georges – who’s still looking delish in all his salt and pepper wonderment, talks to the girls and informs them they are the last six girls remaining – who knew? – before asking them who they think is their biggest threat in the competition. There’s no head-scratching here, Sarah and Yaya are picked by most before NSFW Olivia chooses Nikolina.
Yep. I’d have chosen Nikolina too if the question were “who’s least likely to win”.
So this final test shoot challenge is all about acting, well portraying various emotions in-front of a camera and clearly Ruth already has ‘OMG’ and ‘NO WAY’ down…
As per the norm, Nicole Trunfio shows them all how it’s done..
So after Nicole and Georges make magic together, it’s time for the girls to make emotions as called out by Nicole who also informs them all, she’ll also be reporting back to Cheyenne and Naomi about how they all perform. They mess up, they act up, they behave like bitchy school girls….their mentors will be told!
Naturally, this sits well with ‘Unpleasant Chantal’..
So who does well?
Ruth should have had it won with her ‘cool’ emotion. Her resulting photo screamed 90’s Calvin Klein. Unfortunately though ‘OMG’ and ‘No way!’ were not emotions called out for Ruth.
And during Ruth’s shoot, Georges lets all all know how to look sexy while taking photos “Say A, E, I, O, U under your breath” you know i’m going to try that next time!
NSFW Olivia was asked to be…well….NSFW, so of course, she rocked it.
Yaya was going through so many emotions I’m convinced there was a form of schizophrenia beginning to emerge. She looked amazing doing it, and we get a first glimpse as to her potential now she’s weave-less..
Who did not so good? Ugh..Chantal. Had Nicole yelled out “Unpleasant” as an emotion, then Chantal would have had this down to a tee. I think Georges nailed it when he said “This is really bad Chantal, get angry!” It’s ok Georges, i’m doing all the angry for both me and Chantal.
Nikolina. Oh bless her cotton socks. When asked to be ecstatic, all she could muster up was something akin to “i’m on a heavy flow, but because of my libra fleurs, I can ride a horse!”
And of course, the golden child, Sarah. She underplayed almost every emotion. Surprised became scared, confused became confusing which made Sarah confused about acting confused.
Now i’m confused.
So shock horror, NSFW Olivia wins the test shoot!
Final campaign shoot time! Now, I don’t blame any of the girls for being thrown for a curve ball here. The way it’s explained, this campaign shoot will see the girls being suspended from a harness above the new Lexus CT 200h, where they will have 20 minutes to pose and get photographs.
In realty, the girls were going to be unexpectedly flung across the room at warp speed and ‘hope’ to finish out with a decent image of them posing mid-fling above the car.
This ain’t an easy one.
Before the shoot takes place, it’s time for Naomi and Cheyenne to check in with their teams and talk about Nicole’s notes she had taken earlier during the test shoot. Now Brittaney’s no longer around, Naomi needs a new whipping horse and who better to take the role than Chantal.
She deserves it though. She flatly throws out Nicole’s critiques and as being wrong but Naomi isn’t having any part of it “you’re not giving a full 100%. You need to fix this or else you’re not going any further.” It’s not the harshest we’ve seen Naomi, but it’s about time she decides to stop sweeping her stinking attitude under the carpet and deflecting to someone else.
Shoot time! It’s fun to watch the girls experience the flinging bungee for the very first time. Unsure of what exactly is going to happen, they quickly discover they have little to no control over what is happening to them.
Ruth has incredible trouble trying to remain feminine and glamorous while surging 300 miles an hour through the air.
by the end…no one even really knows if she even managed to snag one usable shot.
Sarah looked amazing and had on this glorious black gown with thigh high split, she was zooming through the air giving ‘great posture’ but couldn’t match it with her dead face.
Chantal decided the easiest approach to modelling while being thrown across the room was to point and go with a peter pan type pose. Naomi is having none of it though…oh, I forgot to mention, Naomi has a whip.
Yes, a whip.
She’s gone from mourning mamma last week to dominatrix mamma this week. Nicole at least seems to be impressed with Naomi’s newest accessory this week.
Both Chantal and Sarah did manage to come out with a couple of shots to work with while we’re still unsure about Ruth.
Time for Team Cheyenne to step in and take flight. Yaya, with her newly visible brain structure (or haircut as its commonly known) is looking all space mod for her shoot. Like previous attempts by Yaya to be graceful in the air (remember the trampoline test shoot?) Yaya is once again all legs askew and not doing too well.
By the end, she’s decided to go with a weird ‘forehead salute’ type of pose that sort of works well with her outfit.
NSFW Olivia. Damn girl looks amazing. I think she’s beginning to warm on me. While she looks stunning, her dress is so full and voluminous it’s hiding her legs while she’s zooming through the air making her look like a legless floating beautiful ghost.
Nikolina. I’m still blessing her cotton socks. She’s trying to be confident, trying to be the little train that could, but we’re not buying it and if anyone was going to injure themselves during the shoot, of course it’s going to be the girl who’s showing the most fear.
Thankfully though the injury wasn’t that bad, but on the flip side, a scraped knee can hurt like a sonofabitch and after a few quick words of support from Cheyenne (you just know if this was Ruth, Naomi would be saying ‘nut up champ’) Nikolina gets back up and flies away.
Now it’s time to score each individual photo giving a total team score with the team with the lowest score hitting the elimination room. Judging by the photos, Team Cheyenne should have this easily right?
Ruth received an 8 for this…
Either Yalande Waldock (the Lexus brand ambassador) is totally blind or I know crap all about campaign shoots. The score of 8 for Ruth’s photo was shocking in itself and see’s team Naomi win AGAIN and even Naomi is shocked with her win.
Considering NSFW Olivia won the campaign shoot for her individual photo, Yaya and Nikolina are headed to face Miss Whiplash in elimination. The standard of previous eliminations has seen both girls fight it out verbally in front of either Naomi or Cheyenne before a decision is made, but this elimination….I didn’t think it was that boring, but according to Naomi, she’d much prefer to pick up a book and guzzle a glass of wine.
You think Yaya is impressed with that? Nostrils flaring, steam beginning to explode out of her ears….if it was appropriate for the models to strike a judge, you just know Yaya would have laid the smackdown on Naomi – and she did, well sort of…
She fought back against Naomi, even telling her that she’s talking a load of bull (well in nicer words) and eventually, Yaya’s bite back wins her victory.
Nikolina cries. Naomi pretends to be upset.
So we now have our final five girls and what’s this? Next week is the finale? So soon? Well next week sees an awkward presentation from Ruth, Naomi acting like a spoiled child who’s not being given enough attention, a photo shoot, a catwalk for a very well known designer and finally, a winner crowned!
My team? Well Sarah’s my last standing member, but after seeing how NSFW Olivia performed today, i’m claiming her as an unofficial team Anthobuzz member!
When a 15 year old girl goes missing in a small country town resulting in the discovery of the work of a serial killer who do you call? Jane Halifax of course! Well actually, it’s Detective Eve Sergeant, but they’re both played by Rebecca Gibney and they both have the same kind of job.
Showing that the local police force in the fictional town of Mingara are a bunch of complete dimwits, Detective Inspector Lachlan McKenzie (Peter O’Brien) lures his old partner (professionally and romantically) Eve Winter to help him find the missing 15 year old Becky who disappeared after leaving a party and determine whether the case is linked to the five bodies recently found in a mass grave.
They are joined by Detective Senior Constable Bridget Anderson played by the impressive Chloé Boreham and Detective Senior Constable Dan Wild played by an underused Liam McIntyre and the four in their designer black suits stride into Mingara and immediately make an impact with the beer soaked and unpleasant residents of the small country town.
Without sugar coating it, the main issue with The Killing Field is that it feels like an over-extended weekly crime episodic show. It’s like we’ve just been thrown into a special movie length one-off where we have already established a relationship with Eve Winter and understand why she’s removed herself from field work, why she has to be lured back and know and care about her past relationship with Lachlan McKenzie. It’s this lack of lead character development that can feel somewhat jarring when it’s suddenly thrust at us the first time we meet Winter and McKenzie.
Of course, Gibney, cropped hair and business suits, plays as well as she can as the damaged Eve Winter. There’s a clinical and detached air about her that feels like an homage to DCI Jane Tennison (Helen Mirren, Prime Suspect) but sadly, Eve Winter, instead of presenting as a powerhouse authoritative figure instead comes off as slightly smug and self-righteous when interacting with potential suspects and Peter O’Brien…well, he’s there, but he’s given as much screen time as the supporting players and his Lachlan McKenzie only seems to be there to distract Eve with inappropriately timed flirtations.
But not all is lost. As a standard, run-of-the-mill police procedural, The Killing Field should offer enough to keep eyes on the screen until the shocking end. A small country town, a missing girl, a mass grave, mob mentality and a complete set of shady characters – enough to keep you guessing who the killer is until the reveal…it’s got the foundations just not the fortification.
Having watched enough Hannibal-Criminal Minds-CSI-SVU etc etc, The Killing Field aims high but falls short of the standard set by previous outings in the genre, but that said, I enjoyed what was offered to me and happily watched right to the end – even if some aspects of the characters and story lines were frustrating (a suspect is literally paraded around town in-front of local bogans resulting in a rather confronting situation) and it was good to watch Gibney finally shake off the warm and happy shackles of Julie Rafter.
The 13-episode drama focuses on Berry as Molly Watts, an astronaut who’s trying to reconnect with her family after returning from spending a year on a solo space mission. What happens to her in space lead to events that will ultimately change the course of human history.
After scoring a set of straight 9’s from the judges, South Australian mum’s Bree and Jessica beat out Chloe and Kelly to take out the title of My Kitchen Rules champions for 2014 and earning themselves a cool $250,000.
I must say, I was a little taken aback by the mum’s win though. Sitting there watching the two hour cooking marathon, both myself and my boyfriend were convinced, the least liked of the two teams – Chloe and Kelly, were sure to win.
And this was based purely on the judges comments while eating the courses – though I can only assume, the bones found in the trout and the thick cut rose glass on the desert was what let the girls down.
Just like last season, both Bree and Jess and Kelly and Chloe had no idea who had in fact won even though the finale was filmed over a year ago. Two endings were filmed with each team winning and it wasn’t until last night’s airing that Bree and Jess discovered they had beaten the well traveled foodies.
After the hooplah that has been talk of rigged scoring, judge favoritism, bullying and teams being sent to cooking classes (perhaps they should send them to a cooking class where they actually learn to cook – Harry, i’m talking about you) My Kitchen Rules finishes for another year on a high and a massive ratings win.
My Kitchen Rules is set to return for another season – with or without Pete Evans – in 2015 on Channel 7.
Was I the only one who thought, after all the promotion, we’d be seeing a Chloe and Kelly vs Helena and Vikki finale?
So, Chloe and Kelly plus Bree and Jessica in the finale of My Kitchen Rules 2014….Who’d have thunk it? Some are calling the Perth girls win into the finale over Paul and Blair a farce and only done for ratings – there’s even a handful of ‘Boycott MKR 2014 finale‘ Facebook pages up and running and ousted contestants are less than impressed with how the two have acted throughout the season.
Don’t forget, they barely made it through the very first round of instant restaurants.
Remember the uproar when they went through and we all called foul on Manu’s scoring?
Call it what you will…there’s been more than enough ‘choice’ scores put up by judges throughout this season that has dramatically affected and thus created this final pairing we have in front of us tonight.
Needless to say, while the two were far from being anyone’s favorite team, the ‘well traveled foodies’ have, over the extended course of this season, worn me down with their cooking ability to a point, where I actually prefer these two over the inane Helena and Vikki – but that’s an entirely different post on it’s own.
Bree and Jess on the other hand looked set to have a breezy path into the finales until..you know…Jess’s complete breakdown during the MKR truck rounds and from then on, the mum’s have been on a rocky path that has been less in-your-face and less confrontational than Chloe and Kelly yet has seen them just scrape into the finale.
So while the final two teams in the finale are a surprise (I foresaw a Paul and Blair vs Cathy and Anna finale) both teams have had their fair share of wins and near misses to ensure that it’s going to be hard to pick an easy win.
Who’s your tip to win? Do you think Chloe and Kelly’s win was rigged for ratings?
My Kitchen Rules finale airs tonight, Channel 7 at 7:30pm
More details are starting to emerge about FOX’s new Batman prequel series titled “Gotham” which centers around Gotham City Police Commissioner, Detective James ‘Jim’ Gordon (Ben McKenzie – The O.C) and his efforts to fight crime in city of ambitious and creative criminals.
While FOX have been clear to note that Gotham is not a prequel to the Batman character, they have announced that David Mazouz (Touch), has been cast as a series regular to play a young Bruce Wayne. It’s been revealed that when Bruce’s story begins on Gotham, his parents have been murdered he’s relying on help from Alfred Pennyworth and Commissioner Gordon.
Along with the casting of a young Bruce Wayne, newcomer Camren Bicondova has been cast to play a young Selina Kyle who eventually takes on the persona of Catwoman.
Joining Ben McKenzie, Camren Bicondova and David Mazouz is Sean Pertwee as Alfred Pennyworth, Robin Lord Taylor as Oswald Cobblepot aka The Penguin, and Jada Pinkett Smith as Fish Mooney.
Each episode will be one hour, and the pilot will be written and produced by Bruno Heller, a British screenwriter best known for co-creating the HBO-BBC produced drama “Rome,” which explored Ancient Rome’s reign under Julius Caesar and Emperor Augustus.
Gotham has been given a series order by FOX and is set to premiere in the fall.
There’ll be at least three people dressed as Superman, a couple of Storm Troopers and some people dressed up in outfits referencing such obscure characters you’ll be wondering how comfortable they could be under all the layers and body paint. Yes, Supanova Expo is almost here again!
As per usual, Gold Coast and Melbourne are the first stops with an impressive line-up of movie and TV stars available for autographs, photo sessions and even better, Q&A seminars, throughout the weekend.
Gold Coast (April 4-6) and Melbourne (April 11-13) will see names like Lucy Lawless (Xena Warrior Princess), Michael Rooker (The Walking Dead), Finn Jones (Game of Thrones), Lindsay Wagner (The Bionic Woman), Voice talent from Adventure Time plus Verne Troyer (Austin Powers Movies) and Peter Mayhew (Chewbacca Star Wars Trilogy) all appearing.
Sydney and Perth venues are also expecting a decent lineup of stars with Jon Heder (Napoleon Dynamite), John Barrowman (Torchwood), Katie Cassidy (Melrose Place 2.0/Arrow) and Michael Rosenbaum (Smallville) all slated to appear.
Like every year, the event organizers at SupaNova have put together some amazing ticketing deals allowing the biggest fans get the best experiences!
There’s a Middle Earth Magic Pass for $250 which includes a group photo with cast members of The Hobbit, priority queuing for photo ops and autographs plus entry to the Middle Earth Q&A panel on the Sunday.
Also, there’s a Fan of the Arena pass for $250 for fans of Lucy Lawless and Spartacus which along with priority queuing also includes a group photo with Lawless and Manu Bennett (Crixus in Spartacus).
I’ve attended the last 5 events, meeting and getting photos with the likes of Barbara Eden (I Dream of Jeanie) and Eliza Dushku (Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Dollhouse), Peter Facinelli (Nurse Jackie), Charisma Carpenter (Angel) and Claire Kramer (Buffy the Vampire Slayer). While the photo and autograph ops are great fun, it’s the Q&A seminars that are the most fun! Great way to find out some unknown or rare facts about some of your favorite shows!
Update: James Callis (Merlin, Battlestar Galactica) and Freema Agyeman (Dr. Who, The Carrie Diaries) have been added to the Melbourne/Gold Coast line-up! Manu Bennett has had to cancel due to Arrow filming running overtime while Lucy Lawless has had to pull out of all commitments from Sundays schedule, though she’ll still appear Friday night and Saturday.
To keep updated with all the news, hit the Supanova Expo Facebook Page!
One never thinks reporting the finding of a dead body could ever lead them to being named as the number one suspect, but that is exactly what happens to Ben Gundelach (Martin Henderson) in tonight’s brand new drama Secrets and Lies on Channel 10.
Thom Murnane (Hunter Stratton Boland), a child well known to Ben and his family has been found murdered and dumped leads to Ben’s life spiraling out of control as Detective Sargeant Ian “The Vulture” Cornielle (Anthony Hayes) places significant pressure on him as the state’s number one suspect in the murder.
As the investigation unfolds, it becomes evident that everybody has their own secrets and lies…
Set in Brisbane, this six part series is gripping and enthralling and will have you questioning as to who is telling the truth and who is trying desperately to hide their lies.
To keep viewers watching and to keep in trend with viewers watching while online, Network Ten are including a multi-platform integration with Secrets and Lies including partnering with Zeebox (users will have access to additional footage, images and audio files during the broadcast) and a Secrets and Lies Website offering a prequel webisode and additions to police interviews and suspect bios all designed to help the viewers work through evidence gathered and attempt to unlock the killer behind the crime. TenPlay will also offer catch-up episodes and behind the scenes footage while Twitter and Facebook followers will be given hints and tips while each episode airs.
So is Secrets and Lies enthralling? Completely. Martin Henderson, Anthony Hayes, Adrienne Pickering, Diana Glenn and even the younger cast are all impressive and offer solid performances.
Just who did kill young Thom Murnane?
Secrets and Lies premieres tonight, Channel 10 at 8:30pm.
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